one done only to start another

okay, it is practically december and i have completed another christmas present. finally. it was the headband from hell. this was one of those projects where it should have only taken a quarter of the time it actually took to finish it. so irritated with myself. i probably had to pull out a good eight inches total along the way due to my being slightly distracted. however, it is now done and you can see it here.
so, all that frustration aside, we now have a grand total of (insert drum roll here) four completely finished items and one that still needs eyes. so almost five. considering my considerable lack of speed (in my opinion, not shared by my non-knitting relatives), not bad at all. so, now i'm moving on to the wedding shawl. technically, it should be a couple more hats, but my gracious father and dear hubby have decided that the shawl should take priority since it has the hardest deadline. aren't they the sweetest!?
anyway, the wedding shawl. my best friend is getting married at the beginning of january (it should be cold) and is wearing a strapless dress (gorgeous but not entirely practical for the weather), so i've decided to make her a shawl to keep her warmer. she knows it is coming as she helped me find the exact color of yarn she wanted, surprisingly an exact match of main wedding color (not actually surprising). so, tonight's goal is to do a swatch, probably a little bigger than the average swatch. this is mostly because i'm going to practice the wet blocking on it. yay for learning a new skill!
awesome. so, the wedding shawl. i'm really excited about this for a couple of reasons. first, ever since i got married, i absolutely fall apart at weddings. lame. i know. anyway, i go to pieces every single time because i flash back to my own vows and the feeling of security and love and hope that went with them (and still do). so every time i hear someone else (especially someone close to me) saying their vows, i can just see their eyes light up with promise and the knowledge that they'll be sharing their journey from that moment on (i'm a bit of a sap). this shawl is going to be their for their journey. second, and i'm fully aware of how corny this is going to sound, God. i know, but bear with me on this one. they are getting married two weeks after christmas, the entrance of Christ into our journey. there are many references to God looking on his people as a bridegroom looks on his bride. so, this whole life journey as partners thing always refers straight back to our relationship and journey with God. just like her soon-to-be husband (if not more so), He will be by her side for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse. i am so excited to see her start on this journey for three (her, him, and Him). i'm liable to embarrass myself with tears at this one.

how can i keep from singing...

i think God is trying to tell be something today, because as soon as i reached the point this morning that i decided that i was not a fan of this day in any way, shape, or form, the song that pops into my head and refuses to vacate the premises is this one:

"There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring

And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing

I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives

And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give

How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing"

i love this song. perhaps my day will start to improve now. here's hoping.

sing with me, how great...

i am that nerd that will sing, out loud, whatever song happens to be stuck in my head. if i don't know all the words, i will be whistling at full volume. this is liable to happen anywhere. parking lots are common. work, more often than i care to admit. home, all the time. you get the idea. doesn't matter at all what the song is. if i'm thinking about babies, it will be a lullaby. if i just got out of my car, it is more than likely to be oldies. if there isn't a thing going through my head, there will suddenly burst forth a song from church. perhaps God is trying to tell me something.
on the rare occasion that words or whistling isn't spouting forth from my mouth, i can almost guarantee that i am moving. if i'm standing up, i will be dancing about. if i'm seated, i call it chair dancing and head bobbing. i try to make sure there isn't anyone around, however i'm seldom successful. i'm far too easy to sneak up on. this is especially problematic when at a store of any kind, they always have something playing.
i know all of this is rather random, but i was reading adam young's blog and couldn't help thinking about this. i must say in response to that particular post, that i am completely guilty of crying every time that song is sung at church, to the point that it would be exceptionally embarrassing if anyone turned around and noticed. an "i'm fine" is never a sufficient answer when surrounded by people that love you. go figure.
anyway, all of this thinking led me to ponder, where did this particular reaction to music in general come from? well, the singing and humming and whistling came from mama. no question about it. the one of the things i distinctly recall from every age i've been is my mother's humming. not necessarily a tune of any kind. just humming. it was always, and continues to be for that matter, the most soothing sound in the entire world. followed by running water. i dunno, i guess continuing the music on after what others can hear has died away is possibly the most comforting thought i've got. some things never die away. there's a metaphor there that i really don't think needs to be explained (your hint: God's love). one of those things is definitely my mother's humming. it is like a heart beat. i think my heart hums, possibly along with a greater song, the audible music for which is simply turned too low to be heard by most.
the dancing part is easy. that comes from two places: my parents and my dance teacher. my parents because when i would (and still do) dance around like a crazy person will assure that i am, in fact, not crazy and will often join me in whatever movement is happening at the time. my dance teacher for helping me actually be coordinated and loving me despite how bad i'm certain i was at times. thanks teri. you'll probably never truly understand how much class with you did for me and my self-confidence.
all that to say, God is so good. i think the singing and dancing and music are the closest i've gotten to communing with him. i think knitting is getting close to that level. after all, His creativity begot ours and praise comes in every form there is.
no point is holding it back. praise him with everything you've got (no matter how crazy you think you may look).

gotta keep on chugging along

okay, well, let's see...what have i accomplished lately...
over last weekend, while on our churches family retreat, i started and finished the scarf for my mom for christmas, which you can see here. i'm actually fairly proud of this one, not because it was super complicated or i had to learn some amazing new skill to make it, but because of how it helped me build relationships. (just so you know, i'm fully aware of how corny this is going to sound.) as i was working on it, the girls i was there with were ooo-ing and ahh-ing over it (mild self-esteem boost for me) and talking about how they would love to make one too! well, of course i informed them that i would be thrilled to teach them how. from that conversation, we all decided that we should get together on a fairly regular basis to hang out and be crafty and play cards. personally, i find this to be a fabulous idea for a couple of reasons. a) i'm not the best at making new friends so this group wanting to get together with me fairly often is exciting. b) i love to knit. i just do. getting to show others how and them being excited about it is beyond delightful to me. afterall, what is the point in creating if others cannot enjoy it with you?
this idea of being in community completely ties back into the kinds of things that we talked about at retreat as well. we discussed living and being in community as a way to live daily in the presense of God. so, as these things usually go, it got me thinking about the different communities i'm involved in (ie. work, home, church, friends, etc.) and wondering if i'm living in such a way as to welcome the presense of God into those communities. am i really creating community the way God wants community to work? are any of us really supporting, loving, welcoming, or being in community properly? well, i like to think that i do, but it goes back to what i said about loving properly. we tend to believe what we want to be true, not necessarily what is true. so, i think i'm going to put this on my "things i need to consciously work on" list, because if we aren't functioning properly in community, are we really functioning properly individually? something to ponder. well, wish me luck and lend me prayers! i'm going to need them.